If I Could Afford to be Vain

It is surely a shame to think
How sad some people are,
Some are prone to shake or stink,
Leaving the world so marred.

Some people have no tact
And sloppily speak out of turn.
They dress a-mess, I must confess,
And need lessons how to act.

Ugly people are not pretty
And have little to offer.
Even if their insides shine,
Their faces are quite the bother.

Fat people are just fat
And have folds of dimpled skin.
Most spaces are far too small
To fit a fervent fatty in.

So think of the curse, if you dare,
And how horrible it would be,
To have to take out on a date
A person who was all three!